Some different meanings for terms in our business...

• CONTRACTOR - A gambler who never gets to shuffle, cut or deal!
• BID OPENING - A poker game in which the losing hand wins
• LOW BIDDER - A contractor who is wondering what he/she has left out
• ENGINEER'S ESTIMATE - The cost of construction in Heaven
• CRITICAL PATH METHOD - A management technique for losing your shirt under perfect control
• O.S.H.A. - A protective coating made by half-baking a mixture of fine print, split hairs, red tape and baloney
    - usually applied at random with a shot gun
• STRIKE - An effort to increase egg production by strangling the chicken
• DELAYED PAYMENT - A tourniquet applied at the pockets
• COMPLETION DATE - The point at which liquidated damages begin
• LIQUIDATED DAMAGES - A penalty for failing to achieve the impossible

  If you know of a clean joke, send it to us. We love to make people laugh - it brightens up everyone's day.